In life we always have to make tough decisions, especially when we suffer from the anxiety of one choice over another. We may not know which decision to make, nor which one will bring the best outcome. In my life, there have been two times where I had to make a decision to stay or to walk away. I chose one of each when I did these actions.
For the one where I walked away, I tried to stay for two years. I went to a Jewish camp up north in the summer of 2013 in Santa Rosa, California, in which I met somebody named Landon. Even though we weren't in each other's cabin, we still met and talked a lot, even hanging out during free time. After camp, we remained in contact via text. Well, he had a horrible home life. It just seemed that no one liked him, including his family, his school and his friends. This all got him into a deep depression, and I tried my hardest to help for the next year. The North American Federation of Temple Youth (NFTY), an organization where Jewish teens meet and hang out occasionally, gave Landon some good in his life, but only very temporarily. In the summer of 2014, we met again in Santa Rosa, where me and several other people tried to prevent him from hurting himself. Well, besides for the daily falls that happened, we succeeded... and then camp ended once again. His depression peaked again, and me and my friend Shaina tried our hardest to help him. We tried and tried, until it was to no avail. Eventually, I told Shaina, "God forbid he kills himself. I mean, we've been trying for months now but he's still depressed. This is a personal journey that he has to take alone." So, I walked away, decreasing contact with him, eventually not talking to him again... until I did. When I did, many months had passed, and he was in a much better position. His depression had vanished. He was much happier, and I was proud of him. I walked away earlier as his was his own journey to take. Even if I tried, he would always have something to counter it.*
Also in the summer of 2013, I started taekwando, the Korean martial art. My mother had wanted me to do it because 1) I needed a sport and tennis and other sports had failed, and 2) my long time friend Matthew was a black belt at the school and had been practicing since 2006. Anyways, I was reluctant at first, as I always thought that martial arts were for little kids. I was wrong. But, I didn't realize that at first. I was too stubborn to even go, fighting with my parents about going or not. And then, my mom made a deal with me: do it for three months, and if I didn't like it at the end, I could quit. I agreed, and after a month I started to really enjoy it. Two years later, I'm happy I stuck to it, and am looking forward to get my black belt around mid-junior year.
I believe there are always two ways to solve problems: decide to stay and to leave. These two events above are very different from one another, but they both represent a decision where I chose to stay or leave. In these cases, the "suffering child" were the decisions I had to make, choosing to stay with taekwando, and choosing to leave with Landon. Do you stay or leave? Staying is the best choice, but leave if you can't take it anymore.
*Landon is much happier now and is living happily. All of his problems have resided and he's headed down a good path in life.
The story with Landon is very touching and I think all of us in our lives have face and very very very very small version of what he was experiencing when we think nothing is going right and you made the right decision to let him find himself and let him trust himself more. Very touching agin and great job.
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